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A Frickin’ Good Napoleon Dynamite Cocktail

Oh, sure, I’ll be watching the Oscars on Sunday like the rest of America. Who am I to miss out on a pop culture moment like Angelina Jolie’s right leg?

But don’t make me participate in an Oscar pool or ask me how many of the nominated movies I’ve seen, because I’ll disappoint you every time. I’m there for the fashion and the spectacle, not really for the films themselves.

Most of the movies I truly love, the ones I’ve seen so often I can quote them from start to finish, weren’t nominated for any Academy Award.

Napoleon Dynamite cocktail and tots

I’d rather be making a cameo at the Val party with Cher and Tai than crying it out over Million Dollar Baby anyway.

That’s why I’m utterly charmed by Lights Camera Booze by Kourtney Jason and Lauren Metz.

If, like me, you’re of the generation that knows “when someone asks if you’re a god, you say yes!” and why “on Wednesdays, we wear pink,” you’ll understand the gist of the book completely.

It’s a tongue-in-cheek–and cocktail-in-hand–guide to drinking games for classic flicks like Clueless, Ghostbusters, Mean Girls, The Big Lebowski, Wayne’s World, and Office Space, all adorably illustrated by Amanda Lanzone.

Each movie gets a signature drink, a list of catchphrases and moments from the film that signal when you should sip, and a final challenge for all the slightly inebriated participants to try once the credits roll.

Napoleon Dynamite cocktail and tots

My drinking game days are pretty far behind me, but there’s no reason I can’t mix up a Babe Ruth–that’s whiskey, ginger ale, and a squeeze of lime–while watching The Sandlot with Dan or pouring a few watermelon bellinis for a girls’ night sleepover with Dirty Dancing (it’s fifth grade all over again!…sorta!).

Or we could all sip on mai tais–er, Tina Tais–while re-watching one of my all-time favorite films, Napoleon Dynamite, which should be in the food movie pantheon for its opening credit sequence alone.

I mean, we all know the lines by heart anyway (I maaaaaay have quoted the movie in my wedding vows), and even if we can’t replicate the dance, a little rum might loosen us up enough to try.

vote for pedro t-shirt and Napoleon Dynamite cocktail

If not, we can just sit back and feel like we’re in a big ol’ mansion somewhere, soaking it up in a hot tub with our soul mates.

Clearly it would be appropriate to serve your Tina Tais with dang quesadillas and tots, or maybe someone caught you a delicious bass that you’d like to cook. Don’t stay home and eat all the freaking chips!

If you’re not imbibing, pour yourself a big glass of milk, because you could be drinking whole if you wanted to.

Don’t forget to save a little food and take it out to Tina, the eponymous llama, when you’re done with the meal, and afterward, it would be really nice if you could pull me into town.

And if none of that made any sense to you, why are you not heading off to watch Napoleon Dynamite this very second? Gosh!

Napoleon Dynamite cocktail and tots

Napoleon Dynamite Cocktail - The Tina Tai

Yield: 4 drinks
Prep Time: 5 minutes
Total Time: 5 minutes

Heck yeah! If you'd vote for Pedro and can draw a liger, you'll love this mai tai Napoleon Dynamite cocktail inspired by the movie.

Ingredients

  • 3/4 cup spiced rum
  • 1/4 cup coconut rum
  • 2 tablespoons (1 fluid ounce) grenadine
  • 3 cups passion fruit juice
  • lime and orange rounds, for garnish

Instructions

  1. Fill 4 highball glasses or large Old-Fashioned glasses with ice.
  2. Add the spiced and coconut rums, grenadine, and passion fruit juice to a small pitcher and stir to combine.
  3. Divide between the prepared glasses.
  4. Garnish with lime and orange rounds and serve immediately.

Notes

adapted from Lights Camera Booze by Kourtney Jason and Lauren Metz

Nutrition Information:
Yield: 4 Serving Size: 1
Amount Per Serving: Calories: 255Total Fat: 0gSaturated Fat: 0gTrans Fat: 0gUnsaturated Fat: 0gCholesterol: 0mgSodium: 13mgCarbohydrates: 36gFiber: 2gSugar: 32gProtein: 2g

The nutritional information above is computer-generated and only an estimate.

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9 Comments

  1. My question is: How will this cocktail pair with a delicious bass? Other than that, I love EVERYTHING about today’s post and I must get this book immediately.

    1. Irene, when you drink this cocktail with a delicious bass, you’ll feel like you’re weightless, in the middle of the ocean, surrounded by tiny little seahorses.

  2. There is so much I love about this post – that I’m not really sure where to start. Also I’m alone at the office and we have everything on hand to make this – so there goes my Monday. (yup even passion fruit juice – we’re working on tiki drinks too).

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